We all have chores we dread. At some point, most couples argue over domestic responsibilities. Anxiety from unfinished chores often creates relationship discord. Whether both parties work at home, from home, or offsite, partners who assist each other with the household reap domestic harmony.
This week’s post won’t debate the division of labor in your home. That’s a topic for another blog. 52 Love is about helping you grow closer to your partner by actively working toward greater intimacy. In Week 11 we discussed speaking gratitude for the thankless tasks your partner regularly shoulders alone. This week, regardless of which of you bears the brunt of the household chores, show appreciation and humility to your partner by assisting her with something she usually handles on her own.
There are countless tasks you could commandeer for your partner. Empty the litterbox. Take the dog for a walk. Drop off the library books. Sweep the tile. Rake the leaves. Water the plants. Wash the windows—nobody wants to do that. The list is endless. And if you aren’t sure how you can be of service, simply ask: How may I help?
If your partner is finicky about specific chores, such as how to properly load a dishwasher or the best way to organize the cupboards, you have two options. Steer clear of chores that might trigger a soapbox correction, or embrace your partner’s idiosyncrasies and indulge her in her preferences. The former skirts a potential squabble. The latter goes the extra mile by communicating that her predilections are important to you. Either option serves your purpose.
Stress decreases libido. Willingness to serve is attractive in a mate. Higher sexual satisfaction is linked to partners who pull their weight around the house. Splitting the work means there’s more energy for sex and more motivation for your partner to initiate it.
Your partner’s chore list might be particularly long this week. Rather than grab for low-hanging fruit, divide and conquer the big tasks so you can regroup with quality time when the work is finished. Or reinforce that you’re a team by doing the chores together.
Flirt while you work. Brush your side along hers as you wash and dry dishes together. Slip sexy banter into your conversation while you both fold laundry. Turn chore play into foreplay, which leads to the most intimate of post-work celebrations: messing up the sheets together.
If you try this intimacy tip or have a better recommendation, let me know in the comments. For weekly suggestions on how to show your partner love, sign up for my blog, 52 Love, in the sidebar.
